Navigating the Terrifying Terrain of Vulnerability: 4 Ways to Open Your Heart and Build Strong Relationships
Have you had your heart broken?
Been burned, crushed, stunned?
I suppose we all have.
Bouncing back takes time, but some of us feel the heavy weight dragging along every step we take. Going out and connecting with others is not on our list of favorite things to do.
We tend to judge others quickly- it’s a great protection mechanism and we certainly trust NO ONE.
Why?
Because with heartache and betrayal, comes fear. Often when we experience a deep wound, opening ourselves up again is frightening.
The idea of exposing our innermost thoughts, emotions, and insecurities brings on the terror of being rejected and crushed again.
No one likes that!
It’s natural to want to guard your heart, but fear of opening up will only lead to more despair and loneliness.
At some point, we must become vulnerable again, or we risk isolation from deep, authentic relationships.
Aside from the fear, showing someone all our imperfections and flaws is also a blow to the ego. Too many people reside inside an imposter that masks their true inner spirit. The problem is the constant act of pretending becomes overwhelmingly draining.
However, when we strip away the barriers we’ve created around our hearts, we open up a space for meaningful and often profound conversations.
Building Bonds
Whether it is a long friendship, casual relationship, or an intimate one, bonds are created when we express our weird, wonderful selves.
People can see the soul behind the flesh when we share our emotions No longer are we strangers. We recognize our similarities as humans, instead of wandering among 8 billion bodies feeling all alone.
Being vulnerable sets our spirit free and invites others to do the same
So, are you ready to be vulnerable again?
Are you excited to show up as you, without fear or apology?
I hope so.
Four Ways to Open Your Heart and Build Strong Relationships
- Go Slow
Ease into conversations about your experiences and thoughts. By telling someone a funny story or a sad moment in your life, it will give them a glimpse into your emotions without going full-throttle. As you receive positive responses and watch connections take place you’ll gain more confidence in opening up.
2. Cultivate Self-Compassion
Give yourself some kindness. You have compassion when it comes
to other people’s suffering, but what about your own? Self-compassion is not a weakness or an opportunity to cry victim, it is a pathway to self-love.
When you can truly love yourself first, others will vibrate towards you. You are now a role model of self-love and compassion. They want what you have. They are eager to conjoin with you.
3. Practice Active Listening
Engage in conversations with a genuine intention to understand and
connect. Set aside the judgment and the need to respond immediately. Instead, focus on hearing what the other person is truly saying.
4. Watch for Physical Cues
Sometimes words and emotions don’t coincide, but by paying attention to body language and facial expressions, you can learn to read between the lines.
How a person feels is often expressed in his posture and gestures. Are they slouching, flailing their arms, or hiding behind their hands?
Paying close attention and reading cues can give you a better insight as to what an individual is trying to express beyond the verbiage. A person can sense if you care, when you take the time. A strong, sincere desire to understand them opens to door for honesty and vulnerability.
The Wrap- Up
It takes time to peel back the layers of protection we build around our hearts. Revealing your authentic self is scary, especially if your wounds are fresh.
Go slow by practicing self-compassion and self-love first.
Understand and appreciate who you really are and where you have been.
Your story is unique. Your journey bears your soul. Embrace all your quirks, your flaws, and mistakes. And know that everyone has their own list.
When you are ready to open up again, become an active listener while gradually telling pieces of your story.
Remember, when you allow yourself to be seen — inside and out, you invite others to do the same.
Watch your relationships transform. Not only with others but with yourself. You may just be smiling again, real soon!
Stay tuned for Heart-Expanding Practices to Infuse Self-Love coming next. In the meantime you may like Heal Your Broken Heart: 3 Unconventional Methods to Get Back to Life.
